Transcript:Battle of Stuffedgomery
This is the transcript for "Battle of Stuffedgomery". Feel free to edit or add to this page as long as the information comes directly from the episode. [Scene: Stuffedgomery. Pippo is walking through the street, noticing the carcasses of various citizens] Pippo: Who could have done all of this? [Scene: The Stuffedgomery Police Department. The Yellowbeard Pirates have brought Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead with them, all of which who are tied up in rope] Yellowbeard: Imprison them, Landlubber! Landlubber: On it, captain. [Landlubber throws Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead inside of a prison cell] Swashbuckler: Ooh! I just can't wait to see this place blow up to smithereens! Ha ha! Freebooter: The stuffed animals will finally see retribution as of today. Buccaneer: The Figure District are going to look back on us as heroes for this. Thanks to our captain, we're going to erase the existence of a species that's been antagonizing us for years on end! [The members of the Yellowbeard Pirates all laugh] [Scene: Outside of the Stuffedgomery Police Department. Pippo is walking towards the destination] [When walking, he stops to notice that Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead are inside of a prison cell] Pippo: This is not good. [Pippo opens up the bars to the prison cell gently, managing to get through] Pippo: *whispering* Guys? GUYS?! [Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead wake up] Pippo: How'd you all get here? Smile Buddy: It's a long story. Mr. Sprinklehead: You see, that guy and his men out there are responsible for this. [Camera zooms in on Yellowbeard and his crew] Pippo: Figures? Silly Bee: Not just any figures. These guys are the Yellowbeard Pirates. Earlier on, they invaded Stuffedgomery and killed half of its population. Only me, Smile Buddy, Mr. Sprinklehead and you remain. Pippo: So we're the survivors? Silly Bee: Yeah, but there's no way we can defeat that guy. He's got a huge army. Thousands of men at his beck and call. Let's just face the facts. We lost, they won. Might as well accept our inevitable deaths. Pippo: Silly Bee, pessimism does not fit you! Silly Bee: So what? If you were about to die, would you be optimistic? Tell me that, pizza delivery guy! Pippo: I have a plan. Silly Bee: You've got a plan? What is it? Are we going to go out there and fight those guys? Because we won't win! We can't win! Whatever hope we had is lost. Pippo: I'm going to get all of you out of here. Silly Bee: ...and what do you propose we do after that? Pippo: I don't know. I haven't thought that far ahead. However, if we do manage to live through this, moving to another city in California is the only option we've got. Silly Bee: Fine. It's better than dying. So, how are we going to get out, exactly? [Scene: The Stuffedgomery Police Department. The Yellowbeard Pirates have overheard a noise from Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead's prison cell] Unnamed LEGO minifigures: Captain! I think our prisoners are trying to make a run for it! Yellowbeard: They are? Well now, that just won't do. Alright, men! I need all of you around Stuffedgomery. I want to watch those remaining stuffed animals die. Arahahahahahaha! [Scene: Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead's prison cell. Pippo has gotten them out of the rope they were tied up in] Pippo: Now, we need to flee! Those Yellowbeard Pirates are going to notice that something's up soon! [Pippo leaves the prison cell alongside Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead by jumping out of a window] Pippo: Run for your lives, guys! Yellowbeard: *o.s.* What lives? Pippo: What the—? [Camera zooms in on Yellowbeard] Yellowbeard: The lives you're about to be lacking right now? [Pippo, Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead try to run away from Yellowbeard, but the remaining members of the Yellowbeard Pirates corner them] Verruckter Wissenschaftler: Ende der Reihe, Dummköpfe. (English translation: End of the line, fools.) Yellowbeard: Well, well, well, matey. I was hoping that all of the citizens of Stuffedgomery were dead, save for those three idiots over there. However, as it would turn out, there are four stuffed animals that remain. Now, that just won't do. I wanted to see the last of them burn, but with you in the way, you kind of put a damper in my plans, don't ye? Arahahahaha! [Yellowbeard grabs his sword. Pippo looks down at the ground, accepting his fate while Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead are in shock. The rest of the Yellowbeard Pirates begin laughing as Yellowbeard prepares to kill Pippo. Suddenly, a ship horn is heard, distracting everyone there] Weigh: A ship? Anchor: No way! That's impossible! Yellowbeard: What?! It can't be. [Camera zooms in on the Stuffed Animal Pirates' ship. The members of the BFC, the members of the Stuffed Animal Pirates, Evan and Renata walk out] Bedtime Bear: What's going on, punk? Yellowbeard: No! I killed you... I killed all of you! Tito Bear: Not necessarily. Goon: You see, you didn't really check if we were dead. Milo Watson: Which, frankly, was dumb on your part. Black-eyed Jake: When will you villains ever learn? [The members of the BFC, the members of the Stuffed Animal Pirates, Evan and Renata walk off the ship, arriving in Stuffedgomery. As they do, Silly Bee, Smile Buddy, Mr. Sprinklehead and Pippo walk away from the Yellowbeard Pirates, going behind the heroes and siding with them. The Yellowbeard Pirates stand the opposite side of them, preparing for war] Evan Kelly: Now this is just great. I can't wait to wipe that smug smile off of your face! Yellowbeard: You speak arrogantly, my former ally. It is us who will win. Renata Ratcliffe: Oh, now it's you whose speaking arrogantly! [Yellowbeard growls] Bedtime Bear: Men... [Camera zooms in on Bedtime Bear's face] Bedtime Bear: ...assemble! [The BFC and their allies rush into battle against the Yellowbeard Pirates] Yellowbeard: They may have gained a few allies in the midst of all this, but it's still nothing compared to 50,000. Mateys, I need you to attack them with all you got! [Verruckter, Fletcher, Mr. Gold, Link, Reuben, Cassady, Cameron, Platano, Orbit, Mitsubishi, Jimmy, Clinton, Ezekiel, Layla, Weston, Torricellian and Penrod go into battle alongside the unnamed LEGO minifigures and the unnamed dolls] Unnamed dolls: What's the problem with a few stuffed animals anyway? Fletcher Huntley: I say we teach them a lesson! Jingle Snowberg: That's fancy words coming from a former mercenary. Tell me, if I were to pay you right now, would you become our ally? Fletcher: Not on my life, you stupid mutt! Jingle: Well, that's a pity. Oh well. I guess all of you will just be beaten to death by the Stuffed Animal Pirates. Isn't that right, crewmates? Pumpkin Emerson and Woofworth: Yeah! Pikachu: Pika! (English translation: Yeah!) Psyduck: Psy-yi-yi! (English translation: Yeah!) Pippo: You can count me in on this battle. Silly Bee: Well, I've certainly got nothing better to do. Smile Buddy: I'm down for it. Mr. Sprinklehead: As a matter of fact, I've been waiting to kick some Figure District butt for a long time! Mr. Gold: *twirling his cane* Well then, let's get this show on the road! [On another side of Stuffedgomery, Weigh and Anchor have run into Evan and Renata] Weigh: I can't believe you're still alive! Evan: It's a little thing called reanimation, Weigh. Get used to it. Weigh: I'll make sure you die for real this time! [Weigh tries to attack Evan, but Renata counters by kicking him in the face] Weigh: Well, if it isn't another traitor. Renata: You want to get through him, you've got to go through me. Anchor: Sounds like we've got a tag team match heating up over here. Only this time, it's not wrestling. Weigh: Yes, Anchor. Now come on, let's end this quickly. The captain will be sure to give us a promotion as officers if we succeed. Anchor: Ooh! Now that's an offer I just can't resist! [On another side of Stuffedgomery, Landlubber is rushing into battle] Landlubber: Get out, you puny plush toys! I don't have all day! [Suddenly, a stuffed animal sneaks up from behind him] Landlubber: Why, you cheeky little—! [Landlubber goes to hit the stuffed animal with his axe, only for the stuffed animal to counter by pushing him back with a sword] Landlubber: Oh, it's you again! Black-eyed Jake: Up for a rematch, partner? Landlubber: I'll make sure that this is the last I'll see of you! Black-eyed Jake: You know, I was just wondering. Which weapon is stronger? Your axe or... *picks up his sword* ...my sword? Landlubber: Time to find out. [On another side of Stuffedgomery, Freebooter is rushing into battle] Freebooter: Where on Earth are these imbeciles? [Suddenly, a flash appears] Freebooter: Wait a minute. Whose that? [A silhouette of a stuffed animal appears behind Freebooter] Freebooter: An attack from behind will never work on someone of my intellect. [Freebooter grabs his knife. He tries to slit the stuffed animal's throat from behind, but the stuffed animal counters by putting something around his neck] Freebooter: Ugh! [Camera zooms in on the stuffed animal, revealing himself to be Milo] Milo: You know, I'm not the killing type, but... despite only being half-Bear, I'm still a member of the Bear Clan, so if you mess with anyone in my family, I won't hesitate to kill you. [Freebooter manages to escape the object that Milo put around his neck. Afterwards, he attempts to pele kick him, but Milo dodges and Freebooter lands behind him on his feet] Freebooter: Phew! That was close, kid, but I still outsmarted you! Milo: If it's a battle of my brains against your brains, you won't defeat me. [On another side of Stuffedgomery, Buccaneer is rushing into battle] Buccaneer: Stuffed animals, where are you? Ugh! This is boring. When am I'' going to get to fight? '''Goon': *o.s.* Hey! Buccaneer: Who said that? [Camera zooms in on the Goon] Goon: Look up here! [The Goon nearly falls on Buccaneer, but he manages to dodge before he can hit him. Regardless, the Goon still creates a crack in the streets by falling down] Buccaneer: Ah! What did you do? Goon: Are you surprised? That's why I'm the muscle of the BFC! Buccaneer: The dumb muscle of the BFC if you ask me. Goon: Hey! You said you were the dumb cohort of the Yellowbeard Pirates. I wouldn't be too cocky! Buccaneer: I'll kill you... even if I die, I'll kill you! Goon: Foolish fool. I'm a Bear, meaning that I have murderous intent on my side. Buccaneer: A pirate against a natural born killer. I like the sound of that! [On another side of Stuffedgomery, Swashbuckler is rushing into battle] Swashbuckler: Where are some stuffed animals already? Ha ha! Tito: *o.s.* Right here. Swashbuckler: Huh? [Camera zooms in on Tito] Swashbuckler: Ah, you're that panda I met a while back. Ha ha! Tito: Yes indeed. I remember that you bit me. Swashbuckler: Yes. You were quite tasty. Ha ha! Now this time, I'm going to eat you whole. Ha ha! Tito: Just try me, pal. Swashbuckler: You don't know everything about me, dude. Ha ha! With a few tricks up my sleeve, I'll finish you off. Ha ha! [Suddenly, Swashbuckler begins to chomp on the street and goes underground] Tito: Where is he going? [Swashbuckler comes up from behind Tito and goes to bite him on his head. However, Tito counters by swinging him across the streets] Swashbuckler: You piece of trash! Ha ha! Next time I'll get you. Ha ha! Tito: Well, if that's the case, why don't you show me what you can do? [On another side of Stuffedgomery, Yellowbeard is watching as the Yellowbeard Pirates face off against the BFC and their allies] Yellowbeard: Well, everything's going according to plan. Arahahahaha! [Yellowbeard attempts to walk away from the ensuing chaos. However, Bedtime Bear catches up to him] Bedtime Bear: Don't think you can avoid me, sucker! Yellowbeard: Ah, well look at the hero coming in to save the day. [Bedtime Bear tries to attack him, however, Yellowbeard counters by slashing him with his sword] Yellowbeard: How pathetic. It's too cliche if you ask me. Bedtime Bear: That's where you're wrong. You may be the villain, but I'm no hero. I'm a freaking antihero! I just happen to be on the good side at the moment. Yellowbeard: Is that it? Well then, matey, I suppose ye won't have a problem fighting dirty, won't ye? Bedtime Bear: You can count on me to be the dirtiest player in the game. Yellowbeard: I've heard enough of your chitchat, teddy bear. Time to die! [Yellowbeard goes to attack Bedtime Bear, but he counters, pushing him onto another side of the streets] Yellowbeard: Arahahahaha! Well, you're certainly one of the strongest opponents I've ever faced, if not the strongest. My other opponents hardly put up fights. [Yellowbeard goes to stab Bedtime Bear with his sword, but he counters by using his sword to protect him] Yellowbeard: Ah, I see you're skilled at sword fighting too, huh? This should be an interesting match. Arahahahahahaha! Bedtime Bear: I've had it with that stupid laugh of yours. It's time we end this war! [On another side of Stuffedgomery, the Stuffed Animal Pirates, Pippo, Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead have begun fighting Verruckter, Fletcher, Mr. Gold, Link, Reuben, Cassady, Cameron, Platano, Orbit, Mitsubishi, Jimmy, Clinton, Ezekiel, Layla, Weston, Torricellian, Penrod, the unnamed LEGO minifigures and the unnamed dolls] Pippo: You were right, Silly Bee. [Pippo attacks another one of the unnamed LEGO minifigures] Pippo: There are too many of them. Silly Bee: Yeah. But luckily, we've got backup for this fight! [The unnamed dolls lunge at Silly Bee, but Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead step in front of him] Smile Buddy: Don't lay a hand on my boss! [Smile Buddy knocks out a few of the unnamed dolls] Smile Buddy: A little help over here, Mr. Sprinklehead. Mr. Sprinklehead: I'm trying, but there's a large abundance of them! [Mr. Sprinklehead attacks more of the unnamed dolls] Silly Bee: Things would go much more quicker if the Catbots, Dogbots and Birdbots were still alive. Oh well. What can you do? [Silly Bee attacks some more of the unnamed LEGO minifigures] Pippo: How are things going over there, Stuffed Animal Pirates? Jingle: We're just taking care of business. Link Retro: My stats say that I have a 100% chance of winning. Verruckter: Zeit für das große Finale. Fletcher? (English translation: Time for the grand finale. Fletcher?) Fletcher: Yes, Verruckter? Verruckter: Sie wissen, was zu tun ist. (English translation: You know what must be done.) Fletcher: Got it. Men, let's charge! Mr. Gold, Link, Reuben Bandit, Cassady, Cameron, Platano Cascara, Orbit Atmosphere, Mitsubishi Motor, Jimmy Bozobo, Clinton, Ezekiel Tradesperson, Layla Esposito, Weston Moneybags, Torricellian Cleaner and Penrod Microeconomics: Prepare to die, you stupid stuffed animals! Silly Bee: Watch out for those guys! They're pretty tough! Unnamed LEGO minifigures: You shouldn't take your eyes... Unnamed dolls: ...off of your opponents! [The unnamed LEGO minifigures and the unnamed dolls rush at Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead. Suddenly, Pippo comes from out of nowhere with a gun in hand, shooting down various LEGO minifigures and dolls] Silly Bee: You saved us? Pippo: It was no sweat. Now, it's time we end this! [The remaining unnamed LEGO minifigures and unnamed dolls rush at Pippo, Silly Bee, Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead, but Pippo shoots some of them down alongside Smile Buddy and Mr. Sprinklehead, who he has also given guns to. With only very few remaining, Silly Bee grabs a bazooka gun given to him by Pippo, shooting down the last of them with it, killing them] Pippo: Great job, guys! Jingle: That's was some amazing teamwork back there! Mr. Gold, Link, Reuben, Cassady, Cameron, Platano, Orbit, Mitsubishi, Jimmy, Clinton, Ezekiel, Layla, Weston, Torricellian and Penrod: It's about time we put an end to your lives! Jingle: Crewmates, you know what you have to do! [Mr. Gold, Link and Reuben rush towards Pikachu] Mr. Gold: What's a cute little mouse going to do? Link: Nothing of the sort. All of the stuffed animals we are facing have a 0% chance of winning. Reuben: Then that's no problem at all! Pikachu: PIKACHU! [Pikachu uses Thunderbolt on Mr. Gold, Link and Reuben, killing them] [Cassady, Cameron, Platano and Orbit come towards Psyduck] Psyduck: Psy-yi-yi! [Psyduck uses Amnesia on Cassady, Cameron, Platano and Orbit, making them wonder why they are there] Platano: Que-? ¿Dónde estoy? (English teanslation: What the—? Where am I?) Orbit: Who are you? I've never met you before in my life! Cassady: Ouch! I feel like I've got a blistering headache! Cameron: What's going on? [Suddenly, Psyduck ambushes Cassady, Cameron, Platano and Orbit, pecking them in their throats with his beak, killing them] [Mitsubishi, Jimmy, Clinton and Ezekiel rush towards Pumpkin] Mitsubishi: Kono chīsana inu ga eien no nemurinitsuku jikandesu! (English translation: Time for this little dog to be put in an eternal sleep!) Jimmy: I say it's time that he gets what he freaking deserves! Clinton: I couldn't agree more. Ezekiel: Me neither. Pumpkin: You underestimate me. I'm all bite and no bark! [Pumpkin jumps at Ezekiel, biting him in the chest, killing him. He then jumps at Clinton, biting him in the forehead and causing him to bleed out, killing him. He then goes after Mitsubishi, biting him on his right leg. Mitsubishi tries to force him off but Pumpkin gets close enough to bite him in the nose, causing him to lose his breath, killing him] Jimmy: ♪ If you're happy and you know it, you'll drop dead! ♪ [Jimmy grabs a gun and attempts to shoot Pumpkin with it twice. However, Pumpkin bites Jimmy in the throat, before pinning him to the streets and slamming his head repeatedly into it, killing him] [Layla, Weston, Torricellian and Penrod rush towards Woofworth] Layla: There's no way you're getting away from us, you dumb dog! Weston: Dogs are of low intelligence. I suppose this should be an easy fight. Torricellian: That's a pity. I was hoping to have somewhat of a battle! Penrod: Let's just finish this guy off! Woofworth: Dumb, eh? Of low intelligence, eh? You're all going to regret those words! [Woofworth grabs a pocketknife and jumps at Penrod, slitting his throat, killing him. He then goes after Torricellian, throwing various shuriken at him until one of them stabs him in the chest, killing him. He then jumps at Weston, stabbing him with a pen, killing him] Layla: Like, I'm totally out of here! Woofworth: No way, rich girl! [Layla grabs her purse and attempts to hit Woofworth with it. However, Woofworth counters by grabbing a scythe and hitting her in the head with it, killing her] Jingle: Well, that settles that. Congratulations, you all did well! Silly Bee: Thanks. I appreciate the compliment. Jingle: Say, once this war is over, why don't you, your lapdogs and that bear guy over there come on and join my crew? Silly Bee: That sounds like a good idea. I accept your offer. [On another side of Stuffedgomery, Weigh and Anchor have begun fighting Evan and Renata] Weigh: So, Anchor. Which one do you want? Anchor: I'll take Renata. I've never fought a girl before, so I want to have a little fun. Weigh: Good. Then I suppose that Evan's all mine! [Weigh and Anchor rush at Evan and Renata] Evan: Watch out, Renata! Here they come! Anchor: Prepare to die, girly! [Anchor summons his wooden stick to fight Renata. However, Renata counters by kicking him back] Renata: Relax, Evan. I've got this under control! Weigh: Hey, kid! Don't you know the rules of fighting? Evan: Huh? Where is he? Weigh: NEVER TAKE YOUR EYES OFF OF YOUR OPPONENT! [Weigh goes to stab Evan with his sword, but Evan counters by using his spear in combat] Evan: Does sword vs. spear sound good to you? Renata: Evan, you better not let yourself get killed out there... Anchor: You should really be more concerned about yourself! [Anchor goes to use his wooden stick on Renata, however, she ducks] Renata: A wooden stick isn't going to stop me! You should know me better by now! [Renata goes to punch Anchor, however, he counters by punching her in the face] Anchor: I'm not afraid to hit a girl. That's something you should know by now. Renata: You filthy pirate! [Renata grabs her pepper spray, going to spray Anchor in the eyes, but he ducks and kicks her in the face with both of his feet] Anchor: Pepper spray, your greatest weapon. It's a shame you won't be using it anytime sooner. [Anchor steps on the bottle of pepper spray, breaking it] [Renata begins to get back up to her feet] Anchor: No more tricks, you stupid doll! [Anchor hits Renata with his wooden stick. Afterwards, Renata screams in agony] Anchor: How 'bout a few more hits? Yeah! That sounds like a plan! [Anchor continuously hits Renata with his wooden stick. Afterwards, Renata attempts to get up, but finds that she is almost unable to] Anchor: It's over, girly. Now time to make sure I never see you again! [Anchor grabs his shotgun, shooting Renata in the chest] Evan: Renata, no! Weigh: You're next, Evan! [Weigh goes to attack Evan with his sword, but he counters by using his spear to push him back] Evan: You're in my way, pirate! [Evan goes to stab Weigh with his spear, but he ducks] Weigh: Face it, kid. You're girlfriend's dead. Soon you'll suffer the same fate! Evan: I will not! [Evan attempts to stab Weigh with his spear again, but Weigh counters and uses his sword to stab Evan in the chest] Weigh: Ha! I win! [Suddenly, Evan pulls Weigh's sword out of his chest] [Camera zooms in on Evan] Evan: Well, that's interesting. Weigh: What in the world? Anchor: Weigh's got Evan under control. Might as well be off. [Anchor goes to walk away, however, Renata begins to get back up, catching his attention] Anchor: You're supposed to be dead, girly! Why won't you just die?! [Anchor goes to shoot Renata with his shotgun, however, Renata counters by kicking the shotgun out of his left hand and then Anchor] Renata: This shotgun means so much to you. It would be a shame if someone were to... [Camera zooms in on Renata] Renata: ...break it. [Renata steps on Anchor's shotgun, breaking it] Anchor: How could you?! Renata: You know what they say, "an eye for an eye". You broke my pepper spray bottle, now I broke your shotgun. Anchor: I'll end your life for that! [Anchor grabs his wooden stick, preparing to attack Renata. However, Renata counters by kicking his wooden stick halfway across Stuffedgomery. Afterwards, Anchor tries to punch her, but she sends him flying with one punch] Renata: They don't call me One Punch Woman for nothing. [Renata walks towards Anchor] Anchor: Nobody calls you that! Quit ruining everything, you darn social justice warrior! Renata: Oh, I'm not a social justice warrior. I'm the farthest thing from one. Unlike them, I'm able to think intelligently and can appreciate men. Anchor: Heh. You stupid... stupid doll! [Anchor gets back up to his feet] Anchor: I've had it with you. [Anchor goes to attack Renata, but she counters by kicking him in the face. Afterwards, she punches him repeatedly into the ground] Renata: Is that all you got? Anchor: Fool. My crew will win. They'll destroy Stuffedgomery and then they'll kill all of you traitors! Renata: That's where you're wrong. The BFC will beat the Yellowbeard Pirates. Accept it! [Renata grabs her right high heel and pushes it into Anchor's throat, killing him] Category:Season 1 transcripts Category:Transcripts